Maintaining While Busy

I have started several blog posts since my last, and not found time to complete any. So this will be a bit of a long post, since I still want to share.

My Solution to a Busy Life

Ever feel so overwhelmed that you're ready to burst? That there's no possible way you can get everything you want and need completed, and each day the list keeps growing?

The Big Secret of Life? Prioritizing things Accurately. 

The key to this secret is the correct perspective.

Take a moment think in serious terms: will failing to do this end all my goals in the next month? 6 months? Year? 5 years? You'd be surprised at how 'important' things really aren't as important as we first build them to be. You may Want to get xyz done, but in the grand rush of life there is only so much time, and needs come before wants. 

Next, make the most of your time. Say you're waiting for a certain husband. While you're waiting, start a load of dishes. Wipe down a table or two. I do the dishes every morning and every evening- that way there's never an overwhelming pile. 5 minutes, done- every time. I try to start a load of laundry in the AM, throw it in the dryer when I come home, then the following morning I'll re-start the dryer to de-wrinkle the laundry, do my workout, shower, and while I let my hair air-dry a little I'll fold. Now instead of spending my weekends doing 5+ loads of laundry, I'm only doing 1 or 2. 

I've got this prioritizing thing down. I slack at it sometimes, but when I need to crunch time, I know my schedule is going to be busy, I use my time to the most efficient so I can still find time to relax and enjoy my life.

But that also means things some of the things I do for pleasure must fall away temporarily, like blogging. Of my evening "relax & unwind" activities, blogging, reading, and knitting are in the top group. Knitting came to the top of the list- we're getting close to Christmas, and I've got some gifts I want to complete before then. 

And as I near the end of my Ugly Busy few weeks, I feel great about myself. My house is still clean, I have not slacked on the diet or exercise, and I've been successful at completing my major priorities.

Damaging Internal Dialog

image from Brain Entertainment & More

I have already learned from this "try being healthy" pilot program I'm on that my image of myself is skewed. This realization has brought me into better awareness of my own thoughts and my internal dialog.

For example, a little while ago I laid in bed reading and thought to myself, I better have one last cigarette before bed. It's a thought I've had a hundred times. In fact, I believe it's the smoker's manta; one last cigarette. One last cigarette before bed, work, before I quit. Until we make that break, it truly circles our heads hundreds of thousands of times. 

Back to my bed time thought: for the first time, instead of just processing that thought and having a cigarette, something snapped in my head and asked, "Why?" Yeah that's a good question.

How many times have we done things by auto-instruction? When did our lives get controlled by the "I should" and "I better" without us second-guessing ourselves.

A little over a year ago, I was struggling with my husband being deployed. I was walking to the local convenience (NEX for you military peps) store a half block away. As I crossed the street, I could hear a car appraoching in the distance. I had the most morbid of thoughts: "I should jump out in front of this car. He's going slow enough that it won't kill me, but at least then something interesting and different would happen in my life, and maybe my husband could actually come home for that." 

At the time I laughed at myself over what a odd, silly little thought it was. But as I thought on it more, I had to ask myself, "good lord, where do that come from?!" I soon became obsessing: Am I sick? Am I depressed? Was this silly little thoughts my subconscious trying to tell me there's something seriously wrong with me??

Finally, a friend of mine gave me some excellent advice: "It's your brain's job to think. It's going to think tons of stuff throughout your day. Your connections- what allows you to process those thoughts, to feel those thoughts, to experience those thoughts- be it through sadness of remembering a lost one, laughter over a joke, excitement over something to come- That is what tells you whether it's a good idea or not. You wrote it off right from the start. You're fine- stop giving your brain power it doesn't really have. You might think, 'Gee, it would be nice to rob this bank.' but you'll never do that, will you? "

Huh. I'd never thought of it that way.

Sometimes the mind's processor goes on auto-pilot. We're doing so much with our day, it's the best way to be efficient. Auto-greetings- "good morning", auto reactions- showering/ getting dressed- it happens.

Some of those auto-pilots are good- we don't need to think every thought through.

Some not so much. It's a good reminder to be aware every now and then.

Motivation Through Partners

My husband's been joining me off-and-on in this fitness game in the last few weeks. His work has calmed down, and - since he has more free time to do things like eat - his weight has started to go up. He doesn't want to have a weight problem, like me, so he's started watching what he eats as well. I don't think our freezer has ever had this much veggies before- ever. While our schedules are a little off, since I prefer AM workouts & he does his while I'm still at work, we do find time on weekends to inspire each other as a team, typically in the form of walking.

We went on two 5+ mile walks over the labor day weekend, and found some new corners of our own neighborhood we previously didn't know existed. We often don't talk. We just enjoy the scenery in each other's company; it's become my favorite parts of the weekends.

The Dark Side: with that partnership also comes the enabling. I allow oreos in the house, as I can stop after just 1 serving and the calories aren't horrible. Hearing the crinkling of the package and I know what my husband's up to in the kitchen. Crud. Now I want an oreo, and I already had my share today. Or, more damaging than that, I have been having cravings for Portillo's hotdogs like a pregnant woman (no, not really the case). But those visits hit us for 800-1200 calories easy- 1 day's worth of calories in 1 meal. Not Good. But SOOOOO delicious. He's been strong at turning down my requests, but how long until we both give in?